Summer solstice and a new beginning. It’s Lytha!

Today is the longest day of the year here in the northern hemisphere.

It’s summer solstice! Yay!

summer solstice

Summer solstice for me means a new beginning. Well, not just for me, but for the Universe too. IT IS a new beginning for nature and we are part of nature. This day was anciently called

This day was anciently called Lytha and used to be very much celebrated with fires, flowers, music, dancing, and prayers. It was a celebration of nature and the sun being at their maximum power. The sun from today will be turning a little further from the earth until Yule, winter solstice, the darkest day of the year when it will begin to get closer once more.

People are now so disconnected from nature, it is so sad. Nature was once celebrated as a God, as it is a God. It’s THE God.

summer solsticesummer solstice

Anyway.

I love summer. I love all seasons but summer has a special place in my heart. The combination of long days, warm nights, sleeping with the windows opened, wearing light and loose dresses, walking around the house bare feet without having them turned into an icicle sets me free. And the beach! The beach! Most of all I love summer because I can be in nature half naked and I can swim in open air, at the lake.

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Lately, I’ve been a real wreck, though.

Ever since my mom came to live with me I’ve had difficulties in finding a new rhythm. My mom is a woman of a certain age and she had to change her life completely. Which I guess is not really easy for some, especially if older. So I’ve let her have things her own way as much as I could in order to make her at ease here and suffer the transition as little as possible. But we’re very different people who lived distant for much of their lives and developed opposite habits. Having to live in ways so different from my own had got me tired and with a certain feeling of heaviness both in mind and body.

summer solstice

My yoga practice has been very scarce, for example. The house is small and you need quietness to practice. Same as for meditation. I used to meditate 20 minutes twice a day and now it’s just five minutes here and there, with no schedule whatsoever.

I am not a creature of habit but I do need to keep a certain rhythm to function well. To keep my demons at the gate.

It’s been more difficult lately, and more than once they’ve been able to get inside, all together, and have a party with my brain. Over the years I have learned how to push them back and get well again pretty quickly, but this is why I need practice and discipline.

I’m not eating as healthy as I used to eat and this does something to my mind too, naturally. This and the fact that I am not moving as I once did has awarded me with a lot of extra weight.

But today it’s summer solstice and it’s the perfect day to begin again.

New beginnings require a celebration, a ritual! This is what I’ll do.

At noon, when the sun is at his highest point, I’ll do a series of Surya Namaskar (Sun Salutations). Then, after Shavasana (relaxation), I’ll give myself a full dry body brush and a body scrub to eliminate stagnantly fluids and to peel off old skin. This is something I’ve been doing for a long time and it works wonders for the circulation and the glow of the skin. I use a brush very similar to this one and Himalayan salts like these ones. I do all with as many lit candles as I have, all around the house. Rituals don’t require much, it’s the intentions you set and the power you give them that makes the difference.

Tomorrow will be a new day and I’ll be following my naturals rhythm, allowing myself to come back to me.

Happy Lytha! Happy summer solstice!

 

I’m a Virgo with Aquarius rising, my moon is in Gemini and it probably sucks.

Confession: I have the attention span of a three-year-old. And I also have a Dr. Jekyll and Mr Hyde kind of personality. There are two sides of me. Probably because I’m a Virgo with Aquarius rising, my moon is in Gemini, I don’t know. (According to Myers-Briggs I’m an ENTP-T, actually).

Virgo with Aquarius rising

I get easily bored and I need to change things around me constantly. I don’t know if having multiple passions is a consequence or the cause of this, I only know that I love so many different things.

And I am aware that having many passions is normal and that most people are like this. But I can see how the majority of the people just stick to two or three passions at the most. I engage in all of them.

I love yoga, swimming, sailing, biking, hiking, meditation, spirituality, reading, writing, blogging, taking pictures, interior design, costume design, fashion design, saving pets, gardening, sewing, studying…and I could go on.

And I need to do all of these things, otherwise, I’ll feel like I’m not living! This makes me inconsistent in EVERYTHING because my day is a normal 24 hours day, I don’t have more hours than the normal. Being inconsistent makes me feel unsatisfied because I never really reach the goals I set for every passion. And it’s not that I set goals because I am crazy ambitious! It is something I do on automatic pilot because I love what I’m doing in that moment and I want to do it more, whatever that is.

Virgo with Aquarius rising

 

For example. I love swimming! While I’m swimming laps and feeling great I’ll automatically set the goal of swimming 1,500 km three times per week because I love it so much and it makes me feel so good. But this goal will crash with some other goal I have already going on and with everyday life tasks. So I won’t be able to go swimming three times a week and I’ll feel like a slob. And very unsatisfied.

I have tried to choose. Really, I did. I have tried to select the things I love the most and I have tried to stick to that tiny list. There are things I love doing more than others, but they are still a lot. That tiny list was tiny for me but not actually that tiny! And, it made my life feel caged and boring.

I need to do everything. But I also need to organize my time better and learn to take decisions in a better way.

Last week I totally threw away seven good days.

I wanted to do EVERYTHING and I ended up doing NOTHING. I wanted to do some sewing but then the sun was shining so I felt the need of going for a hike with my bike, but then there was a drawing that I wanted to finish, but they opened the outdoor pool at the pool center where I swim! But then, this and that…

It went on like this for seven days. In between doubts I had to go to the office where I am working for a few hours a week, and then I had to dogsit Max every day, the house needed a good clean…etc. When I was free from all the tasks, I would start to act like an over excited three-year-old in front of Christmas gifts.

Which one to open first? The Virgo in me wanted to open one, but Aquarius and Gemini had their eyes on a different box. Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde! Why can’t I open all the boxes at the same time? I need to choose one, I know. But what if in the meantime the other boxes are taken away?

The metaphor sucks, but it gives the idea.

Anyway, all this indecision had my brain spinning. Trying desperately to take ONE thing up and go, got me very tired and frustrated. The end result was total burn out. I went to sleep early for two nights straight to relax and read, and it worked, I felt better. But this behavior is an ongoing thing for me. This wanting to do too much and ending up not doing anything at all, it’s been like this since the day I was born, more or less. There are times when I am better but then it all gets back to the old way.

 

Virgo with Aquarius rising

 

This happens with my work as well.

I wanted to be my own boss, work from home as an illustrator and designer ever since I was, I think, eight years old. But how do I combine the two things?

How do I juggle all my passions?

How can I do everything, be everything?

I can’t. That’s all.

I have to make peace with the idea that I am human, plain and simple, and that I can’t be in multiple places doing different things at the same time. It’s sad, but it is what it is.

So, after the total burn out, the three-year-old Virgo with Aquarius rising Dr. Jekyll side, signed a pact with four-year-old Gemini moon Mr. Hyde side (both big ENTP-T, so imagine the discussion) and decided to be JUST an illustrator and designer in the first place. As planned. And it’s already a lot since most of the people are just one thing.

I’ll schedule. It’s the only possible way out, as boring as it is for me. I’ll diet from all the passions. Like you weight your carbs during a diet, I’ll weight my time. Reading and watching movies will happen ONLY in the evening. Yoga ONLY in the morning before nine. If I have to go to the office, no yoga. Swimming ONLY on Wednesdays when the pool is always empty for some strange reason. The only days when I’ll do whatever I want whenever I want it will be on the weekends like normal people do. Because that’s what I am. Normal.

Or at least I try to be.